Solution to Immigration Reform and Balancing the Budget

When I was a younger lad growing up in the South, we had as part of a common-sense curriculum, a well-worn set of idioms to guide our direction. No matter what the problem was, it could be turned into an opportunity by the application of those wisdom-laden snippets. One of my favorites was the one about killing two birds with one hand by throwing stones in a bush . . . or something like that. But, I digress . . .

Well, recently I got to thinking about a couple of problems we have in this country: The Budget and Illegal Immigration Reform. To be sure, those are two dynamic issues that the leadership of this nation has been struggling with for years. Well, here is the perfect solution that will allow us to resolve both issues at the same time.

Annex the thirty-one Mexican States and the Federal District as eight American States.

The process, which would allow the United States to resurrect Manifest Destiny, that time-honored, but not recently implemented, mechanism to increase property mass to grow the economy. At the same time, we would virtually eliminate the illiegal immigration reform debate. The following breakdown is the proposed reorganization structure. The new state capitals are listed first.

New Durango
Durango, Aguascalientes, Colima, Jalisco, Nayarit, Sinaloa, and Zacatecas

New California
Baja California and Baja California Sur

New Yucatan
Yucatan, Campeche, and Quintana Roo

Tabacruz
Tabasco, Chiapas, Oaxaca, and Vera Cruz

New Sonora
Sonora, Chihuahua, and Coahuila

Mexico
Federal District, Guerrero, Hidalgo, Mexico, Morelos, and Tlaxcala

New Pueblo
Puebla, Guanajuato, Michoacán, and Querétaro

New Leon
Nuevo Leon, San Luis Potosí, and Tamaulipas

Most of the new states will have a direct economic amelioration, and all will contribute to the renascent rebirth of America as the number one super power in the League of Nations. Among these benefits are:

The addition of about fifty resort or vacation destinations, especially the very lucrative coastal areas, will provide tax dollars for the budgets in Defense and Welfare.

A couple hundred American corporations can legitimately call their manufacturing operations a part of the United States once again. Whether the newly crunched labor numbers become too large—due to increased employee taxes and mandated insurance premiums—will influence whether the industrial concerns remain in the new United States, or migrate westward to China, will be determined later.

The elimination of that worthless and annoying Peso will give the new states our more stable dollar for the new Americans to buy such things as over-priced gasoline and health care. As an ancillary benefit, there will be new jobs in fields such as the banking and finance industries to manage all of those new credit card accounts generated, as well as a like number of jobs in the insurance industry.

The Department of Defense can exponentially increase the number of foot soldiers in the United States Armed Forces with the immediate addition of an estimated 50 million able-bodied young men and women ready to prove their sacrifice for this country—sort of like an initiation.

Reducing the land mass of the U.S. southern border would ensure tighter controls against illegal immigration. The border fence will not be necessary thereby freeing up $900 Billion. A U.S. Army company of 18 sharpshooters—three units of six men (or women, for all of you Annie Oakley wannabes), working in eight-hour shifts—posted at the Guatemalan border would do the trick.

Central Mexico could also provide an out-of-sight, out-of-mind, location for a new federal prison to relieve overcrowding in our current 50 state prison systems. The current states would have to give up federal funds currently appropriated by Washington for individual security needs. However, there would be less recidivism to the state of the initial conviction. Since most relapse by convicts occurs within 100 miles of the institution of their incarceration and, as most criminals are pathetically unintelligent, upon release they can be supplied with directionally inverted maps, driving them further away from the Continental United States. If they make it as far south as the new United States border, the sharpshooters can use them as live practice targets.

In addition, further annexation with the following two areas will extend the benefits of the entire program.

New Salvador
Guatemala, Belize, El Salvador, and Honduras

New Panama
Nicaragua, Costa Rica, and Panama

By incorporating these new areas we can add the taxability of the lucrative Central American drug trade. And it will also bring us back to a nice round number of 60 States.

So what have we got to lose?